Poetry Forum

And Emily Bishop, often neglected but not lacking in Street cred.

Sylvia Plath! As a mental health nurse (soon to be retired, thank the Lord) I couldn't possibly agree with that. Suzanne would be drinking absinthe itself in no time at all and she'd have to switch from gas to electric which is not very affordable these days. As for these other contenders they're al...

Hello Suzanne, having read some of your stuff I would recommend Emily Dickinson.

R.Broath/Barrie, thanks for your comments. I've made some adjustments to accomodate the metre and I knew that the line which followed "search engines" was poor and that's been altered for the better, I hope. This did actually originate with my daughter making the comment I ascribed to her ...

Is it about a pig?I know bovine is to do with cattle but in human terminology means stupid. I get the impression it is about a person or a type of person. The wristwatch and the bulging stomach are a neat analogy. I much prefer this revised, fleshed-out( pardon the pun) version.

How about "never mind caught", I know you have "never" earlier in the line but still! "still less caught"! Thought the last line was very good.

Hi I adore rhymes and rhythms such as these and though the metre does trip somewhat in places ( especially the fourth line) it remains an enjoyable and fascinating read. Best Wishes Ray

Hello R another brilliant piece of work. All I'd find fault with is "our Nation's conscience shake" which sounds a bit forced. Why capitalise nation? The last two lines are wonderful, of course. Well done again. Ray

I overheard my daughter in a game of "pretend", "Somebody's being mean to imaginary friends!" She confided this to Jasmine, who nodded like she knew and I felt obliged to interject, "Where?" and "When?" and "Who?" Then they told me how they'd noticed...

Hello smiffey, this was written as a consequence of the NHS mental health unit I worked in being shut down, There was a long period before the actual closure date and admissions had been stopped when we had very little to do. A lot of anger and frustration ensued!It's also an expression of my discon...

Am I Experienced? I'll say! I knew King Kong when he was just a monkey nut. I suppose I shall have to start talking posh and wearing sensible shoes. Are you allowed to rhyme in the Lounge?

R I've consulted Russell Brand and he says you should never swallow on your first date. Juggling is fine, though. Ray

Enjoyed this very much, I love poems which end on a melancholy note such as this. There are many nice lines within as identified by others. A couple of ordinary, too well-worn phrases, though, "ready prepared" and"brave and foolish". After I'd finished reading I immediately thoug...

i'd have preferred the third line to rhyme with lines 1,2 and 4 but then I enjoy rhyme. The last line is impressive.

This is very entertaining and an original idea. Brilliant! I'd have thought touch-typed would be better. I had to look up prolusion in the dictionary, wouldn't prolusion was over be more appropriate?

This reminded me of Keira Knightley, Eat Your Dinner by Jilted John/ John Shuttleworth. Marianne Arekzic, you'll save on the shopping!

My original impression when I read this was that the person being addressed was dead and I can now see that I was mistaken in that belief.Partly that's because of the comments you made above, but also the revised version leaves less to the imagination, perhaps. I don't like the first few lines you'v...

There's a temptation when people applaud you for virtues that you don't possess to just keep one's mouth shut. However, I must confess that the preference I'm expressing is more sexual than poetic. My sexuality, obviously, not Miss Duffy's. Having said that, it's only a preference and I could be qui...

This is so very good! Both the parts -bouldered ground, needling wind, raftered bones and my favourite, wraiths of mountainy men - and the whole produce a vivid, almost palpable effect. I had never heard the word louring until a few months ago and now it seems to be everywhere. Sleekit? Is that a lo...

It's very moving, concise and well-written. There's something about the sea, evocation of and association with memories of the departed isn't there? Vastness, strangeness and the Other Shore etc. "gently waves repeat your name; meet me on the beach." reminds me of Wuthering Heights. I thin...

I approached the close thinking there would be a clever or funny punchline to finish but it ends rather weakly, I think. Mind you, it could be that I'm misunderstanding it completely. It is meant to be Pot-belied and not Pot-bellied?

The other one is Fame of a sort by me, she only has a minor part!

I think this is excellent and I'd second most of the other comments. First two stanzas are fine and though the revised third is an improvement I feel the final two lines rather let it down. "onward rushed to plot wilderness" is particularly strong, I think.Is that repetition of "water...

you could say that" her sadness oozed" and as for the title, Ooze That Girl?

Lucky Miss Duffy, featured in two poems within 24 hours. I have to say I'd have had no idea whatsoever that it were she. I like "edged nervily", it's precisely what kids did and still do in the halls and gymnasiums. Do you need a comma after pupils, or dresses for that matter? I don't unde...