Poetry Forum

This is a song called " The Crown of Sympathy ", by a band I suppose many people here won't have heard of, called My Dying Bride . They're a group from Yorkshire who have been very popular in the (Extreme) Metal scene for about 15 years. It's a fantastic song, but I think that the best thi...

"A good read." Those are encouraging words. I very much enjoyed writing it for a time, because I was just listing words and associations in my notebook and plucking the components of the sentences out of lists and that. It was an interesting process for me. And also, I was trying to make m...

Inspiring, indeed. Funny and charmingly written.

Smoke cascading from her mouth, mist over a mountain, falling and twisting. Glittering green eyes, dew on pasture, soft and glistening. Cute little nose, Christmas and kittens, twitching and smiling. I was in a nightclub though. Hard walls and right-angles, sitting on the concrete stairs. Leaning ag...

Indeed, I want to learn to write with different styles. Use of language is so much more important than any other element of writing, it would seem.

I'll get some Beckett after I've finished my current book (which is Crime and Punishment... so that may take a bit).

What a charming voice the narrator has.

This made me laugh.

Hiya! I think this is great as a story. I wasn't expecting it to be this good as a tale when I started reading it, but I'm quite impressed now. There's some nice ironical observations of human behaviour worked into it too, if you catch my drift... "As if he had personally taken part in the grea...

Yeah, well it's really useful and nice to have a place like this. I don't really have much idea how to write at the moment, so it's good to have somewhere to be able to exhibit peices without fear of extremely harsh criticism or silly loved-up pretense. The atmosphere on this site is probably just a...

My rancid flat/squat overlooks King Street, which for those not familiar with London is the main thoroughfare running between Westminster and the Benson & Hedges-chic pramlands of the Southwest. A lot of political marches go up there: hippy-chic wannabes, housewives and 15-year old students bunk...

Herr Doktor ran for a moment on the spot, blinded by adrenaline to the fact that monsterous Lo Fat had grabbed hold of his clothing. But now he tried for an even more effortsome break from the room, this time motivated by fear rather than oppurtunism. His shirt ripped loudly from his back, revealing...

"graying from damp" I don't have the artistic ability to render much in the way of constructive criticism, but I must say that I thoroughly enjoyed this. It's so lean: whole scenes described in single sentences. What a fascinating way of writing. Powerful use of ''pseudowords'', hah. This ...

Most people would see my life as a one-way trip into the sickness, and hold the belief that the scene of my death will be somewhere in the vicinity of a red-brown needle, but then, most people aren’t particularly wise. I’d disagree, anyway, but maybe my protestations are naïve. I love people, but we...

You think you can only show me what IS poetry. You fail to recognise that a thing is as much what it is as what it isn't. Show me what isn't poetry. Only when we know what is too much can we know what is enough, to quote a poet, heh. The developments in most western culture and society have past me ...

Then what is poetry ?

Thanks. It took a whole 60 seconds to write, so I'm glad my hard work has been so well-received.

I suppose you're right. You are justified in writing broken-up prose.

Don't see why not.

I don't understand the difference between this stanza and prose broken up into lines and capitalised. Wafting maybe of rotten cabbage now, She moves her mass like marshmallow, Indifferent to stares and concealed giggles. Wafting maybe of rotten cabbage now, she moves her mass like marshmallow, indif...

Yeah, true. Apologies are in order for my use of hyperbole, but if you contextualise the comment makes sense. The thing is, the entire forum baffles me to a greater or less extent, for two reasons which I can discern, and to apply them to single poems seems trolling-behaviour. Still, I am willing, a...

But really. I'd appreciate some feedback on that other poem. Train me up, and then I'll be able to make some worthy comments, haha.

What I wrote wasn't in a self-pitying tone. It was just a (mistaken) reaction to the (as-I-thought-at-the-time) accusation: Now another bit of mish-mashing that is no doubt going to get more attention than my last 10 poems combined. Of course, I didn't understand the context of that sentence, so it ...

Haha, that's such a brilliant troll. What an artist.

I'd really rather you comment on the other poem I put up, really. I'd like some feedback on that... how it squares up, as it were. "Lines Based On Walt Whitman's Song Of Myself".

From Morbid Angel ?

To be fair, none of what I post gets attention.

Why the hyperdermic metaphors ?!

That's a recurring theme in teenpoetry that I don't understand.